Experience in the
First Degree!
Let me start with the situation that has prompted this blog. In September of 2006, my husband was sitting in a left turn lane waiting to
make his turn. A woman in an
oncoming vehicle chose that intersection to look for something on her dash while speeding
up to get through because the
light had turned yellow. Her attention was
not where it should be and
consequently, she drove into his car leaving him an incomplete quadriplegic with damage to the C3 and
4, and C5 and
6 areas of his spine. This was the beginning of a most incredible
journey in pain, suffering, emotional upheaval, and
abject fear.
I had been
cleaning the house and getting
ready for a nice
evening starting
with a great dinner and quiet time with Wayne. Everything was set but it was starting to get a bit late. I checked my watch to see what time it was. I was expecting him to be
home or
at least call me
around 3 or 3:30. It was now 4:30 and no call. The phone rang around 5 and I thought about him. Imagine
my surprise
to hear an unfamiliar voice asking me if this was Mrs. Persall? I said yes tentatively, thinking I was going to get sold a set of golf clubs or a free trip. She said she
was calling from the Royal
Columbian Hospital to let me know that they had my husband there and that he had been involved in a car accident. I expressed
alarm and she reassured me that they were just waiting for x-rays to come
back to
confirm whether he had any broken bones or not. I said I would be there right
away and her next sentence chills me to this very
day. She said "Don't rush!"
I got to emergency and asked where he was. They pointed
me in the right direction and as I got closer to
his spot, I could
hear him crying and calling out for help please this
hurts so bad! They didn't dare give him anything for the pain until the neuropathic surgeon had seen
him because they could mask something
critical. It broke my heart to see him
so bad off. He had a collar
around his neck and wasn't moving much and as soon as he saw me,
he begged me to find someone to help him get
something for the pain. It took
another hour before the surgeon was
there to see him and the x-rays. We were told that he would be staying in the hospital for a bit and that although he was paralyzed
at the moment, he should
expect a 95% chance of recovery. I was terrified for him but positive in my outlook because of
that information. It is now May of 2009 and Wayne still has not
walked. He has had some
recovery and is hopeful of more but we aren't there yet.
In this journey
we have met some wonderful and some terrible people. The medical system is already stressed to the max but needs to provide so much more. He spent 16 months in hospital and GF Strong in Vancouver and received
many different levels
of care. There
doesn't seem to be any real qualifier when it
comes to quadriplegia. This experience has changed both
of us
and I
might add,
for the
better. It is hard to believe that such a terrible thing
could bring good positive changes to your life but it is true. I have come to realize my inner
strength and my limitations. My love for
life and how wonderful
it can be is fortified even more. I
love my husband with all
my heart and that
won't change. It is said that 90% of spouses and loved ones will leave a situation like this because it is just
too hard to
deal with. I have to say
that I understand that and don't judge those
who can't handle it.
I take my hat off to those who stick with it (including myself)
because believe me it isn't easy! I want to share this experience because there is a light at the end of the tunnel and people need to know it. Others will share similar experiences
and likely will feel the
same frustrations and anger that we felt. They need to know there is help to
be found and that they are
not alone. I felt terribly alone and desolate. So, this light will shine for
others and I will continue to update regularly while telling the rest of the story. I am thankful for a loving God in my life and a mother who taught me that courage doesn’t come from fists but rather the tiny little voice in the quiet that says
"You can do it." Peace!
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